On a recent episode of the Just B with Bethenny Frankel podcast, Hoda Kotb shared the story of her emotional adoption journey—including the fact that she had worried she’d run out of time to be a mother.
The TODAY host, 58, told Bethenny about realizing she wanted to adopt children, saying she finally came to the conclusion that “Maybe there’s a kid that needs me.”
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Hoda Kotb Recalls Her Journey To Becoming The Mom Of Daughter Haley Joy
Hoda was candid throughout her interview with Bethenny, recalling how she had thought that she didn’t want children before coming to the realization that she indeed did want to become a mother. The moment of clarity came during a walk in the Hamptons with a friend, who remarked to the host, “Well, we never wanted kids.”
“And I stopped and I looked at her and said, ‘I actually did,” Hoda recalled on the podcast. “And she said, ‘You never said that,’ and I said, ‘Because it can’t be,’ and I couldn’t believe I said it out loud.” After admitting it out loud for the first time, the journalist began to undertake the steps needed to begin the adoption process. “Everywhere I looked, I saw a sign that it was possible,” said Hoda. “I filled out all the paperwork and did all the stuff that you do, and they’re like, ‘Okay, maybe a year, maybe six months, maybe five years, bye.'”
However, she heard back from the adoption agency even sooner than expected. "I was sitting there, and I was doing some phone call with some nutritionist about something and babbling on and on. My phone beeped, and I looked at it, and it said Ashley, and Ashley was the lady from my adoption agency, and she said, 'If I ever text you, you need to call me back immediately.' I saw her name, I hung up the phone, I took a yellow pad out, and I wrote, '11:55. This is the moment everything changes,' I knew it," she shared. "I took a deep breath and dialed the number, and I said, 'Ashley?' and she said two words to me. She said, 'She's here.'"
The TODAY with Hoda & Jenna anchor continued through tears, "I don't know what birth feels like, and I bet it was amazing, but this was really close. I remember that feeling like it was yesterday."
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'[I Thought] It Was Too Late' To Raise Children, Says Hoda
Hoda's emotions over her choice to become a mother and finally getting that chance through adoption were palpable as she shared her story on the podcast—and she also sympathized with those who, like she did, might think the chance at motherhood is now past them. "For girls that it's too late for, you don't say [you want kids] because if you say it, you're expressing something that you're never going to get."
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Treatment for breast cancer, which Hoda had been diagnosed with in 2007 at the age of 43, had left her unable to have children, and she had already been divorced—so the host felt like she was simply destined to be an aunt. But once she spoke the words out loud, she knew that wanting to become a mother was her truth. That led to the adoption of Haley, now 6, with ex Joel Schiffman. The broadcaster told People's Me Becoming Mom podcast in 2021 about the first time she held Haley after her birth: "They put her in my arms. I haven't carried many babies. She fit like she was born there," Hoda said. "I thought to myself, 'Forever, as long as I have a breath in me, you will be loved and cared for.' She felt like mine right then. It didn't take any time. It happened instantly for me."
Hoda had already decided she'd want to have more than one child, though she had to wait nine months to begin the process of another adoption. After that it was 18 more months of waiting until getting the chance to adopt her younger daughter, Hope Catherine, now 3. The TODAY star remarked about her life with her two children, "I can make our place cozy, our place a sanctuary, our place peaceful, our place full of love. This space right here, this is going to be a beautiful, comfortable, lovely, safe, peaceful place. When I put the key in the door, there is no better feeling."
